开启撰写个人陈述(PS)的月光宝盒！

大家好呀，申请季正如火如荼地进行着，不知道大家都忙碌得怎么样了呢？今天我们来聊聊个人陈述Personal statement, 以下简称PS,的撰写，包括一篇个人陈述应该包括哪些部分，以及撰写个人陈述常见的误区。ps：记得看到最后有惊喜呦~
申请时，除了学习成绩等“硬背景”，个人陈述(PS)可谓留学文书中最重要的部分。能否在几百字的文章中突出自己的优势和闪光点，提交一份Killer PS, 取得招生老师的青睐和认可，是每位同学都要用心关注的重中之重。
在我看来，PS就像给自己做广告，你该从哪些方面、用什么样的表达方式向梦想的学校展示自己？为什么选择这所学校，而不是其他学校？为什么选择这个专业，这个专业又为何应选择你？等等一系列问题，都应该在这则“广告”中体现出来。而你，恰恰是最了解自己的人，包括你的专业、你的经历、你的优势...所以，我建议大部分有能力的同学，先自己完成初稿。
下面我想与大家分享我的观点，关于一篇个人陈述应该包括哪些内容。
【个人陈述应包括哪些内容？】
你为什么选择这个专业/项目？
项目中的哪些课程最吸引你？你最想学到什么？你对什么感兴趣？请提供你对这个项目有所了解的“证据”。这意味着你要认真去学校官网查看项目详情，这是非常重要的！例如，这个项目有去到某个公司的实习机会，你可以提到这样的机会和你的职业愿景非常匹配，可以提升你的职场竞争力。例如，这个项目的有一个研究课题，是你非常感兴趣的，你认为这个项目可以帮助你提高学术水平。
你为什么值得被录取？
你为什么适合学习这个项目？你现在所学习的专业是否与这个项目相关？你是否有相关技能以及经历，能够让你在这个项目中取得成功？其实对于学校而言，录取到一个好的学生，你就成为了学校的宝贵财富，而你要阐述你为什么可以成为学校的财富。
你是否参加过课外实践或实习，以证明你对这个项目/课程的热爱和擅长？提供和项目相关的工作经历，并且将这些工作经历和学校期望的技能/能力联系起来。例如，你有在肯尼亚的交换经历，而你申请的项目是一个非常国际化的商科项目。那么你在肯尼亚的经历就可以分享给你的同学和老师，为他们带来看问题的新视角。
思考你自己的兴趣爱好以及平时参与的活动。他们如何展现出你的个性和技能？最好将这些技能和你所申请的项目/课程联系起来。例如，你说你很喜欢潜水、羽毛球和爬山。但只是提到这些是不够的，你最好说说这些爱好让你成为了一个怎样的人。例如，你爬过各大高峰，每次爬山前你都会缜密计划以达成目标；而在学习的时候也是一样，你会详细安排以取得优异成绩。
这个专业/项目如何能帮你实现职业目标？
尝试描述你在学业有成后对未来有什么打算，以及这个项目将如何帮你在未来取得更大成就？例如，你有三年的HR经验，现在想通过理论学习，在HR领域获得更广泛的知识，并用这些学术知识解决工作中的问题。
ps：记得思考让你为之骄傲的成就，思考哪些经历和特色使得你是独一无二的候选人。
下面，我们来聊聊通过读一些朋友的个人陈述，我都发现了哪些常见问题吧~
【陈述常见问题】
问题1：读起来很无趣，真的很无趣啊
很多朋友就是记录了一下自己的“所作所为”，有点像流水帐：我做了这个，我做了那个。结尾说：我真的很优秀，你们要录取我啊！（只留下招生老师一脸黑人问号，呵呵哒~）
tips：请大家精简亮点！亮点！
把你所有相关经历中最不一样的摆上来，“夺人眼球”。同时，你要清楚你告诉申请学校这些经历的目的——那就是，你的这些经历能体现出你很优秀！请很明确地展现出来，不要只说些高大上的话，拿出事实来证明吧哈哈哈！
这里可以参考我个人陈述中对巴西和芬兰实习经历的总结：
I want to make my career in building stronger trade connections between China,Europe, and Brazil. I recently completed a one-year internship working inBrazil. This firsthand experience ininternational trade has helped me realize how much I do not know, and has focused me on learning more so that I can achieve at a higher level.
尤其是已经在海外交换过的小伙伴，大家肯定会有多多少少的感悟。记得不要把所有经历都记录下来，用一到两句话概括你最大的收获就够了。例如上面这个小段落就有个很清楚的开头，来表达我对未来的计划。
Additionally, I believe it is important to be able to evaluate information and produce reliable research. I believe that your program can help me perfect all of these skills.
最后小段结尾我提到了自己心目中重要的事，而所要申请的项目可以帮我达成这些技能。
另外，学校录取的学生来自全世界，大家可能都有很多不同的“奇葩”经历，所以我们不要认为自己的经历有多么厉害，非要所有细节一字不漏写上去，其实作为读者很可能看着看着就睡着了= = 你需要的是简单概括而不平淡无趣。
问题2：净说些无关紧要的话~
在申请某项目时，最重要的是表达你为什么选择这个项目和这所学校，不要扯得太远。For example，有朋友申请计算机专业，结果申请信上说他非常想到欧洲读计算机专业是因为对西班牙斗牛感兴趣（excuse me？？？）
tips：请不要浪费你的“口水”，去写一些毫不相关的理由
学校想看到你对这个专业学习的热情；
学校想看到，你会在这个专业上下功夫；
学校想看到，这个专业对你未来的职业发展有什么帮助；
学校想了解的是你这个人，想被你说服，为什么你是最优秀的候选人！
 
当你把一些不相关的兴趣爱好写上去时，请思考一下写这个的目的。你告诉学校你很喜欢西班牙斗牛，难道人家就会认为你是一个非常优秀的计算机学生？（这种想法有点太天真咧）
问题3：必要时没有具体内容支撑
我发现大家有时会写一些非常空乏的话，比如有个朋友想证明他自己很有领导能力，于是说自己参加了非常多的活动，然后就没有下文了。句子与句子，段落与段落之间，一定得有很好的连接，否则读者会感到非常困惑。
 
tips：必要时列举具体内容支撑观点
例如当时我怕想证明自己是一个思想开放、易于融入他国文化的人，于是我举了个栗子：
I believe that I grow as a person from being immersed in other countries and cultures. I have already worked and studied abroad, and each time I have gained greater insight into my strengths and talents.
但是盆友们，光是举这个例子还是不够滴，我们还需要一个过渡。比如这里specifically就是一个很好的连接词，你需要说明你举这个例子的目的是什么。你是想告诉学校你从这些经历成长了吗？或者增加了专业知识？或者这个项目可以帮助你更好地成长？在举例之后，我立刻阐明我举例子的目的：
Specifically, I have already worked as an intern abroad both in Finland and in Brazil. In Finland I taught about Chinese culture in high schools for four months. In Brazil my work was much more complex. I was responsible for contacting potential buyers and suppliers globally, and for finding co-operative business partners in China.
两三句说说你工作都做了什么当然还不够，这些工作到底教会了你什么呢？
These experiences in Finland and especially Brazil were invaluable. They enhanced my ability to work effectivelyin multicultural teams and to manage employees with different backgrounds. I also learned how to handle situations which require a change of plans to reachthe end goal. I expect that your programwill offer me a more focused opportunity to develop my skills in my personal development, which I believe will continue by being immersed with different cultures. I believe that your course will best equip me to achieve these aims.
表达自己学会了和不同背景的人打交道，并且在情况改变的情况下能够很好适应。最后和开头段落链接起来，表达自己就是一个喜欢不同文化的人，而你的课程可以帮助我继续和不同文化的人打交道。
就像语文老师教过我们的那样，文章要有起承转合。大家可以思考下自己的申请信是否做到了这几点？
 
问题4：没有清晰结构，思路混乱
虽然有句歌词唱得好：跟着感觉走，但大家千万别跟着自己的感觉写申请信。一会儿说自己的成绩有多棒，一会跳到自己参加的活动有很多；一会儿说自己过去喜欢旅游，一会又跳到自己专业知识有多丰富。唉，这样的申请信没有丝毫的逻辑严谨性。
tips：画思维导图帮助理顺思路
在瑞典求学期间，老师经常叫我们画思维导图。在纸上，把自己所有想要表达的观点一一列举。
写作个人陈述时，我建议大家把想说的都写出来然后归类。所有和学术相关的内容归为一类，所有和实习工作相关的归为一类，所有无关紧要的，归为一类然后剔除，最后再按照一定顺序和逻辑去架构自己的文章。
初稿完成后，建议大家找几个专业人士读你的个人陈述。我当时找了大概有10-15个的native speaker的朋友帮我修改，他们给了很中肯的意见，并且我发现只改语法是不够的，写作思路与结构也需要提高。
【孰能无惑文书修改润色服务】
可能很多小伙伴并没有熟悉的外国老师和朋友，面临着不想找中介、自己的英语又不太地道以致对文书内容拿不准的问题。在后台，也时常有小伙伴询问孰能无惑是否有申请文书相关服务。
其实在瑞典留学时，我邀请过几位优秀的外国老师有偿帮助同学完善他们的申请文书。现在，孰能无惑决定把这些老师介绍给大家。这些老师都有着丰富的学术写作经验，能针对你所申请的项目和你的背景、个人特色，在原有文书的基础上进行语言上的润色或结构上的调整，为你打造有竞争力的个人陈述。下面看看之前合作过的同学如何评价老师们的水平吧~
I appreciate my mentor's help. He polished my motivation letter under a short notice and gave me advices which I didn't consider. The final motivation letter was much better than my previous one. I hope my dream university accept me! I hope that other students will also find their mentors through this platform to help them realize their dreams.
Ju
经过多次沟通，三次修改，我的个人陈述终于定稿。从最初乏善可陈到言之有物，导师不厌其烦地指导我如何架构文章、精炼语言，更重要的是督促我思考如何紧扣所选硕士项目展开论述，让我了解真正的文书应该呈现出的核心内容。严谨、负责、专业、热心，从文书到求学，甄妮及文书导师给了我诸多帮助和指导，是留学DIY一族申请路上值得信赖的伙伴!
Xinyu
I decided to write my letters on my own. It wasn't an easy task, because I had too much things to say and didn't know where to start from. Luckily I found out this platform where I can get guidance from native speakers. My mentor draw a mind map for me and asked several questions on my future goals which I didn't elaborate specifically in my previous letter. Thanks to my mentor for getting my ideas into shape and presenting a reasonable and convincing application letter. I hope that everyone can find the best way to achieve their goals and I strongly recommend this platform.
Tianya
之前找中介，丫的各种套模板！坐等中介申不上给我退费了， 但是甄妮邀请的导师帮我改的真的很认真仔细，最开始我也不知道我有什么优势，还跨专业，导师到学校官网分析学校的要求，仔细帮我发掘，愣是把我无须的PS改的我自己看了都想录取了的程度！力荐！
Wenjing
【文书老师介绍】
Tisa 老师
Transforming words and visions into reality is my motto. Writing invites ideas, histories, connections, creations, dreams, and aspirations to come to life. In a variety of ways, personal and professional stories move forward into our world.
I bring 21 years of professional expertise to this sacred process of writing as a published author, independent scholar, and executive manager in the nonprofit arena. I provide editing, and academic writing. My passion, skill, and experience in these many aspects of writing place me in a unique position to assist you.
Rese 老师
I am a multi-faceted and experienced academic editor, content creator, and idea generator with a broad range of skills. I am ready to EXCEED your expectations. Over 12 years experience providing students with clean, stand-out personal statements for undergraduate and graduate applications, residency processes, and law school admissions.
Mikila老师
I am a native English speaker (comfortable with both UK and US English); a dedicated writer, editor and proofreader; a former Student Career Facilitator trained in resume writing; and I hold a BSc in Economics. I draft, (re)write, revise, critique and overhaul the content, format and style of the written word.
Michael Weis 老师
Michael Weis is the award-winning editor that has more than 15 years' experience. He has a unique personal touch and a lifelong passion for English literature that enables him to turn the written words into perfection. His main areas of expertise include: impeccable grammar, spelling and punctuation (US and UK English), syntax, style and tone, flow and organization. Michael Weis is also the author of many eBooks that are sold in more than 220 000 copies.
 
Doctor of Education (Ed.D.), English Literature | Cambridge, London
2008 - 2011
Master of Education (M.Ed.), English | University of Cambridge
Signe 老师
I am an accomplished developmental editor, copyeditor, proofreader, and resume writer who provides a variety of services. My work has helped countless clients to be invited to a job interview; publish in literary, academic, and trade publications; sign with an agent; gain admittance to a college, graduate, or professional school; and more.
Master of Fine Arts (M.F.A.), Creative Writing (nonfiction emphasis) | University of Alaska Anchorage 2004 - 2007
Owner | Signe Jorgenson Editorial Services March 2015 - Present
I perform developmental editing, copyediting, proofreading, and resume and cover letter services for individual and business clients. I also edit academic documents, creative work, legal documents, translations, and more.
Tracy 老师
Your project is infinitely important to the success of your business or personal endeavor, and Finesse guarantees perfection. After a 26 year history of publishing and 11 years teaching English in university classrooms, I created Finesse Writing and Editing LLC as a means to provide quality writing assistance on a personal and professional level.
Quality communication is the key to success whether you’re a business hoping to generate more attention, an individual striving for the highest level of professional recognition, or a student looking to improve an essay. Whatever your goal, quality writing makes all the difference, and I am committed to providing professional results. Finesse is my company. I write every proposal individually, and I complete all work myself. Original content writing, proofreading, editing, and constructive advice for improvement are just some of the skills you can count on.
 
Master of Fine Arts (M.F.A.), English | University of California, Irvine
1998 - 2001
The MFA program at UC Irvine is ranked #3 in the United States
Keshi 老师
I have a Bachelor's degree in Journalism and Communications/Pre-med from the University of Florida and an M.Ed in Curriculum and Instruction from the University of South Florida. I have over 10 years of experience typing, editing, and creating content for various print and online publications. I currently work in higher education as a college counselor and advisor and am especially knowledgeable on academic writing and assisting students with professional writing tasks.
 
Bachelor of Science in Journalism | University of Florida
Master of Education Curriculum and Instruction | University of South Florida
Emily老师
I graduated this past June from Stanford University with a Bachelor’s Degree in Human Biology and Health Policy. Having done quite a bit of writing (academic, blogging, essay writing, etc), “Fear of the blank page” is real, and I help my clients craft their story and express their thoughts through writing.
Writing college (or scholarship!) application essays can be stressful. I work with students to identify essay topics, organize their thoughts and edit their college application essays. (Sorry, it’s not ethical for me to do it all. I do *not* write the essay for them!)
 
Social Media Intern | Kaiser Family Foundation
September 2015 - June 2016
Health Policy Research Assistant | Department of Health and Human Services - Health Resources and Services Administration
January 2015 - March 2015
Bachelor of Arts (B.A.) | Stanford University
2012 - 2016
Orion 老师
Expat American lawyer specializing in legal/technical editing. DC Bar member and Vanderbilt Law graduate. Highly proficient editor of legal, technical, academic and business documents, particularly materials translated or written by non-native speakers of English. Years of professional experience as a patent editor with a leading Korean IP firm; formerly an English professor at major Korean universities.
【个人陈述修改润色服务详情】
服务1：个人陈述(PS)语言润色
-如果你的文书已经有了清晰的结构和恰当丰富的内容，就差地道精炼的英语表达啦，那么可以选择此项服务；
-800字内，400元，收集初稿后3天内交稿。服务时限为14天，期间可以无限次修改，定稿后将不能再修改。
服务2：个人陈述(PS)深度修改
-深度修改适合对自己的个人陈述结构和内容有较多疑惑的同学。你需要提交你的初稿，填写一份非常详细的问卷供老师挖掘你的专业目标、经历和特点等。
-800字内，1500元，收集问卷和初稿后3天内交稿。服务时限为14天，期间可以无限次修改，定稿后将不能再修改。
早鸟价：11月25日前购买的同学，分别享受文书服务一和服务二50元和100元的优惠，也就是350元和1400元啦。
服务流程：点击“阅读原文”填写基本信息，我们会根据你的专业方向为你匹配相应的老师，并在24小时内回复你的邮件。若有疑问，可以发邮件到xiaozhushou@studyabroad.live