Sapere Aude
以下内容绝大部分来自《字花》，之前看到有人分享，把极少数没有翻译的部分自己补上了。
莫斯科的学生在线杂志《DOXA》的编辑因为“煽动未成年人参加非法反对抗议活动”的罪名而面临监禁，在杂志的休刊辞里，编辑Alla Gutnikova说了以下这番话（节译）：
Alla的原声：
https://doxajournal.ru/lastword-alla
我不打算谈论案件、搜查、审讯、卷宗、审判。那很无聊，也毫无意义。这段日子，我上学，令人疲倦和挫败，但在被捕之前，我仍有时间学习怎样言说真正重要的事情。
我想谈谈哲学和文学。关于班雅明、德希达、卡夫卡、汉纳鄂兰、桑塔格、巴特、福柯、阿甘本，关于奥德雷‧洛德和贝尔‧胡克斯，关于季莫菲娃、特洛斯泰诺娃和拉赫曼尼诺娃。
我想谈谈诗歌，谈谈如何阅读当代诗歌。关于格罗讷斯（Gronas）、达舍夫斯基（Dashevsky）和鲍罗丁（Borodin）。
但现在不是时候，也不是地方。我将把我的琐碎话藏于舌尖，藏在我的喉咙后面，藏在我的胃和我的心之间。我只会说一点点。
我常觉得自己不过像一条小鱼，一只小鸟，一个女学生，一个婴儿，但最近我惊讶地发现，原来布罗茨基也在23岁时受审。并且由于我也算是人类中的一员，我有话要说：
在卡巴拉（Kabbala）中，有tikkun olam的概念──修复世界。我看到这世界是不完美的。我相信，正如耶胡达‧阿米亥所写的那样，世界是为善良和和平而创造的，就像院子里的长椅（在院子里，不是法庭！）。我相信，世界是为温柔、希望、爱、团结、激情、快乐而创造的。
但这个世界是残暴的，充满了令人无法忍受的暴力。而我不想要暴力。任何形式的暴力。没有老师的手伸进女学生的内衣，没有醉酒父亲的拳头打在妻子和孩子的身上。如果我决定列出我们周围所有的暴力，一天是不够的，一个星期也不够，一年也不够。我的眼睛是睁大的。我看到了暴力，我不想要暴力。暴力越多，我就越不想要它。而更重要的是，我不想要最大和最可怕的暴力。
我真的很喜欢阅读。我现在要用别人的声音说话。
在学校，在历史课上，我学到了“你们把自由钉在十字架上，但人的灵魂是没有界限的”和“为了你们的，也为了我们的自由”这两句话。
在高中，我读了阿赫玛托娃的《安魂曲》，金兹堡的《陡峭的小路》，奥库德扎瓦的《封闭的剧院》，雷巴科夫的《阿尔巴特的孩子》。在奥库德扎瓦的诗歌中，我最喜欢的是：
良心、荣誉和尊严，
那是我们的精神军队。
向它伸出你的手掌，
为此，人们不惧怕火。
它的面孔是崇高而美好的。
将你短暂的世纪奉献给它。
也许，你永远不会取得胜利，
但你将作为一个人死去。
在MGIMO[莫斯科国立国际关系学院]，我学习了法语，并记住了艾迪思·皮亚芙的一句话。"Ça ne pouvait pas durer toujours"（不可能永远这样）。还有马克·罗宾的"Ça ne peut pas durer comme ça"（不能这样继续下去）。
十九岁时，我去了马伊达内克（Majdanek）（集中营）和特雷布尔卡（Treblinka）（灭绝营），学会了用七种语言说“再也不”：never again, jamais plus, nie wieder, קיינמאל מער, nigdy więcej, לא עוד。
我研究了犹太哲人，并爱上了两句谚语。拉比·希勒尔说：“如果我不为自己，谁会为我？如果我只为自己，我是什么？如果不是现在，又是什么时候？”而拉比·纳赫曼说：“整个世界是一座狭窄的桥梁，最主要的是完全无所畏惧。”
后来，我进入文化研究学院学习，又学习了几个重要的课程。首先，词语是有意义的。第二，我们必须直呼事物的名字。最后，sapere aude（敢于知道），要有勇气使用自己的思想。
荒谬的是，我们的案件与学童有关。我用英语教孩子们人文学科，当过保姆，并梦想着与“俄罗斯教师”项目一起去一个小镇待上两年，播下智慧、善良、永恒的种子。但俄罗斯认为——用国家检察官特里亚金检察官的话说——我让未成年儿童参与了有生命危险的行动。如果我有孩子（我会的，因为我记得最大的戒律），我会在他们的墙上挂上犹太总督庞修斯·彼拉多的画像，让他们清白无辜地成长。总督庞修斯·彼拉多站着洗他的手——将是这种画像。是的，如果现在思考和感受是危及生命的，我不知道对这些指控该说什么。我洗了我的手。
现在是真相的时刻，透明的时刻。
我的朋友和我都不知道该如何面对恐怖和痛苦，但当我走进地铁时，我没有看到流泪的脸。我没有看到流泪的脸。
我最喜欢的书中，没有一本──儿童或大人的书──教人冷漠、懈怠、懦弱。
我从未被教导过这样的话：
我们是小人物
我是一个简单的人
没有那么多的黑与白
你不能相信任何人
我对这一切不感兴趣
我离政治很远
这不关我的事
什么都不取决于我
主管部门会查清楚的
我一个人能做什么
不，我知道和喜欢截然相反的言语。
约翰·多恩通过海明威之口说：
没有人是一座孤岛，全靠自己。每个人都是大陆的一部分，土地的一部分；如果一个浪头把沿海的悬崖卷入海里，欧洲就会变小。同样，如果它冲走了海角的边缘，或摧毁了你或你的朋友的领地。每个人的死亡也会使我变小，因为我是全人类的一员。因此，不要问钟声为谁而鸣，它为你而鸣。
马哈茂德·达尔维什说：
当你准备早餐时──想想其他人
（别忘了喂鸽子）。
当你进行你的战争时──想想其他人
（不要忘记那些想要和平的人）。
当你缴交你的水费时──想到其他人
（想想那些只有云的水可饮的人）。
当你回家，回你自己的家的时候──想到其他人
（不要忘记那些住在帐篷里的人）。
当你睡觉和数星星的时候，想想其他人
（有的人没有地方睡觉）。
当你用隐喻解放自己时，想想其他人
（那些失去说话权利的人）。
当你想到遥远的他人时──想到你自己
（并说，我希望我是黑暗中的一支蜡烛）。
根纳季．戈洛瓦蒂说：
瞎子不能怒目而视，
哑巴不能愤怒地喊叫，
无臂的人不能拿起武器，
没有腿的人不能前进。
但是，哑巴可以怒目而视，
但是，盲人可以愤怒地大叫，
但是，无腿的人可以拿起武器，
但是，无臂的人可以向前迈进。
我知道有些人被吓坏了。他们选择沉默。但奥德雷·洛德说：
你的沉默不会保护你。
在莫斯科的地铁里，他们宣布：
禁止乘客乘坐驶向死胡同的列车。
而圣彼得堡的水族馆（乐队）则补充说：
列车着火了。
老子通过塔尔科夫斯基说：
而最重要的是，让他们相信自己，让他们像孩子一样无助。因为软弱是一种伟大的东西，而强大是一种虚无。当一个人刚出生的时候，他是软弱的、灵活的。当他死亡时，他是坚硬和麻木不仁的。当一棵树正在生长时，它是温柔的，柔韧的。但当它干燥和坚硬时，它就会死亡。坚硬和力量是死亡的伴侣。柔韧和软弱是存在的新鲜感的表现。因为变硬的东西永远不会赢。（人之生也柔弱，其死也坚强。万物草木之生也柔脆，其死也枯槁。故坚强者死之徒，柔弱者生之徒。是以兵强则不胜，木强则兵，强大处下，柔弱处上。）
请记住，恐惧会吞噬灵魂。记住卡夫卡的人物，他看到“在监狱的院子里竖起了一个绞架，误以为那是为他准备的，在夜里冲出牢房，自己吊死了”。
要像孩子一样。不要害怕问（你们自己和别人）什么是好的，什么是坏的。不要害怕说“皇帝没有衣服”。不要害怕大喊大叫，不要害怕哭泣。重复（对自己和他人）：2+2=4。黑就是黑。白就是白。我是一个人，坚强而勇敢。一个坚强而勇敢的女人。一个强大而勇敢的人。
自由是一个过程，通过这个过程，你会养成不被奴役的习惯。
原文如下：
READ the closing statement of Alla Gutnikova, one of the editors of the Moscow student journal DOXA, who are all facing prison sentences for "inciting minors to take part in illegal opposition protests”. But the speech is about so much more. (The translation was adapted from that of Michelle Panchuk.) Listen to Alla’s original here: https://doxajournal.ru/lastword-alla
“I am not going to speak of the case, the search, the interrogations, the volumes, the trials. That is boring and pointless. These days I attend the school of fatigue and frustration. But before my arrest, I had time to enroll in the school of learning how to speak about truly important things.
I would like to talk about philosophy and literature. About Benjamin, Derrida, Kafka, Arendt, Sontag, Barthes, Foucault, Agamben, about Audre Lorde and bell hooks. About Timofeeva, Tlostanova and Rachmaninova.
I would like to speak about poetry, about how to read contemporary poetry. About Gronas, Dashevsky and Borodin.
But now is not the time nor the place. I will hide my small tender words on the tip of my tongue, in the back of my throat, between my stomach and my heart. I will say just a little.
I often feel like a little fish, a birdling, a schoolgirl, a baby. But recently, I discovered with surprise that Brodsky, too, was put on trial at 23. And, since I have also been counted among the human race, I will say this:
In the Kabbala there is the concept of tikkun olam - repairing the world. I see that the world is imperfect. I believe, as wrote Yehuda Amichai, that the world was created beautiful for goodness and for peace, like a bench in a courtyard (in a courtyard, not a court!). I believe that the world was created for tenderness, hope, love, solidarity, passion, joy.
But the world is atrociously, unbearably full of violence. And I don’t want violence. In any form. No teacher’s hands in schoolgirls’ underwear, no drunken father’s fists on the bodies of wives and children. If I decided to list all the violence around us, a day wouldn’t be enough, nor a week, nor a year. My eyes are wide open. I see violence, and I don’t want violence. The more violence there is, the stronger I don’t want it. And more than anything, I don’t want the biggest and the most frightening violence.
I really love reading. I will now speak with the voices of others.
At school, in history class, I learned the phrases “You crucify freedom, but the soul of man knows no bounds” and “For your, and for our, freedom”.
In high school, I read “Requiem” by Anna Andreyevna Akhmatova, “The Steep Path” by Evgeniya Solomonovna Ginzburg, “The Closed Theater” by Bulat Shalvovich Okudzhava, “The Children of Arbat” by Anatoliy Naumovich Rybakov. Of Okudzhava’s poems I loved most of all:
Conscience, honor and dignity,
There’s our spiritual army.
Hold out your palm to it,
For this, one fears no fire.
Its face is lofty and wonderful.
Dedicate to it your short century.
Maybe, you will never be victorious,
But you'll die as a human.
At MGIMO [Moscow State Institute of International Relations] I learned French and memorized a line from Édith Piaf: “Ça ne pouvait pas durer toujours” [“It could not last forever”]. And from Marc Robine: “Ça ne peut pas durer comme ça” [“It cannot go on like this”].
At nineteen, I traveled to Majdanek and Treblinka and learned to say “never again” in seven languages: never again, jamais plus, nie wieder, קיינמאל מער, nigdy więcej, לא עוד.
I studied Jewish sages and fell in love with two proverbs. Rabbi Hillel said: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I? And if not now, when?” And Rabbi Nachman said: “The whole world is a narrow bridge, and the main thing is to have no fear at all.”
Later, I enrolled at the School of Cultural Studies and learned several more important lessons. First of all, words have meaning. Second, we must call things by their names. And finally, sapere aude, have the courage to use your own mind.
It’s ridiculous that our case has to do with schoolchildren. I taught children the humanities in English, worked as a nanny and dreamed of going with the program “Teacher for Russia” to a small town for two years to sow intelligent, kind, eternal seeds. But Russia - in the words of the state prosecuting attorney, Prosecutor Tryakin - believes that I involved underage children in life-threatening actions. If I ever have children (and I will, because I remember the greatest commandment), I will hang a picture of the Judaean governor Pontius Pilate on their wall, so they grow up in cleanliness. The governor Pontius Pilate standing and washing his hands - such will be the portrait. Yes, if thinking and feeling is now life-threatening, I don’t know what to say about the charges. I wash my hands.
And now is the moment of truth. The hour of transparency.
My friends and I don’t know what to do with ourselves from the horror and the pain, but when I descend into the metro, I don’t see tear-stained faces. I don’t see tear-stained faces.
Not a single of my favorite books - for children or adults - taught indifference, apathy, cowardice. Nowhere have I been taught the words:
we are small people
i am a simple person
it’s not so black and white
you can’t believe anyone
i am not interested in all that
i am far from politics
it’s none of my business
nothing depends on me
competent authorities will figure it out
what could i have done alone
No, I know and love very different words.
John Donne says through Hemingway:
No man is an island, all by himself. Every person is part of the Mainland, part of Land; and if a wave sweeps away a coastal cliff into the sea, Europe will become smaller. And likewise if it washes away the edge of the cape or destroys your castle or your friends. The death of every person diminishes me as well, for I am one with all of humanity. And so, don’t ask for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for you.
Mahmoud Darwich says:
As you prepare your breakfast — think of others
(don’t forget to feed the pigeons).
As you conduct your wars — think of others
(don’t forget those who want peace).
As you pay your water bill — think of others
(think of those who have only the clouds to drink from).
As you go home, your own home — think of others
(don’t forget those who live in tents).
As you sleep and count the stars, think of others
(there are people who have no place to sleep).
As you liberate yourself with metaphors think of others
(those who have lost their right to speak).
And as you think of distant others — think of yourself
(and say, I wish I were a candle in the darkness).
Gennady Golovaty says:
The blind cannot look with wrath,
The mute cannot yell with fury,
The armless cannot take up arms,
The legless cannot march forward.
But, the mute can look wrathfully,
But, the blind can yell furiously,
But, the legless can take up arms.
But, the armless can march forward.
I know some are terrified. They choose silence. But Audre Lorde says:
Your silence will not protect you.
In the Moscow metro, they announce:
Passengers are forbidden on the train heading to a dead end.
And the St. Petersburg [band] Aquarium adds:
This train is on fire.
Lao Tzu, through Tarkovsky, says:
And most important, let them believe in themselves, let them be helpless like children. Because weakness is a great thing, and strength is nothing. When a man is just born, he is weak and flexible. When he dies, he is hard and insensitive. When a tree is growing, it’s tender and pliant. But when it’s dry and hard, it dies. Hardness and strength are death’s companions. Pliancy and weakness are expressions of the freshness of being. Because what has hardened will never win.
Remember that fear eats the soul. Remember the Kafka character who sees “a gallows being erected in the prison yard, mistakenly thinks it is the one intended for him, breaks out of his cell in the night, and goes down and hangs himself”.
Be like children. Don’t be afraid to ask (yourselves and others), what is good and what is bad. Don’t be afraid to say that the emperor has no clothes. Don’t be afraid to yell, to cry. Repeat (to yourselves and others): 2+2=4. Black is black. White is white. I am a person, strong and brave. A strong and brave woman. A strong and brave people.
Freedom is a process by which you develop the habit of being inaccessible to slavery.”
