this could be the greatest time; also the worst（交友帖，清纯女大学生）
For everyone who may see this, I'd like to share few thoughts and plannings of my recent 1.5 years.
我在北大读社会学，还有一年半结束学硕的生活；与此同时在Tiktok—AMS实习；Top 2 学习生活，备考经验，互联网面经，工作tips；You got it:)))))
so far, 在经济压力大，周围同辈叫苦不迭的比较下，我在这个层面还是自满的。But, as u know; for every stage of life, there will be concerns and troubles, for me currently, it's the troublesome of sharing my idea and find connections. I've read tremendous of books and essays that not supposed to be read by a little girl, and felt the need of combining them into something new; therefore, in this winter vacation, I started to read the process and reality
well, I don't know what it says, But I do felt Whitehead is a brilliant guy who has the courage to invent a theory about the universe, I also like various of marco theory making unpredicatable predicted. 我们都知道，现在经济环境很不好；从比较历史的角度，这可能也是“垮掉的一代”的即将开始被直面鞭尸，逆全球化席卷全球；从科学视角分析经济活动的角度，这可能是内需不振，通缩开始的进程。OMG，it is because I see so many medias say things like this, I begin to concern, what shall I do in the rest of my life, cause you have to admit that as a Top2 student, I don't have to worry about the liveihood, who cares what a working classes girl would end by the way; but as a individual,I have the obligation to take care of myself and realize at least partily of my meaning of life.
因为一直在娱乐直播行业，所以我也逐渐将自己训化成了情感服务这个工种的生存模式，在互联网，这叫运营；在金融，这叫基金经理，在传统制造业， 这叫销售，前端。总之你可以起很多名字去命名你所做的，你所完成和贡献的，在你的企业，在你服务的部门，但我们都是产品生产出来后的分发者，检测者和反馈选手。有一句话叫做“万物互联”； 但是前提是，怎么联，人们之间的链接也是需要遵循一定的规律的，Like Hayeks's autonomic order? 所以我从来不把客户当客户，当你减少了这层员工-客户关系，先做朋友时，在中国语境下，这会让你更从容；trust me, no matter MBB consulting elites or the bossy boss, treat them like that; cause fundamentally, why we will have the acquaintance is raised by business chances and the potential of making money together, 在这个意义上，我们是平等的，你不要觉得对方职级比你高，年龄比你大，经验比你多；拜托；就是说在这个经济机器里，大家都是一份子；这不是说我不在言语上尊敬你，甚至是guitian你，只是说，在内心，the attitude matters.
以我为例，我猜豆瓣上大多的用户都是normal people, 我在开头的这些tag, 只是积极证明了我是一个活得很努力的普通人，也许你很聪明，或者很努力；又或者很漂亮？ well I do really don't what else can praise people can see this article, 从小到大我一直这样被夸奖，因此一直活在这样一个bubble， which is 通过夯实自己的各项技能，软硬兼施，总有一天，我会更优秀；直到（并不是某一天或者某一刻）而是我在北大的这半个学期; 当我每天往返中关村——北京大学；上课听着情感劳动的文献，同时还在情感服务着各种公会长（虽然我是官方溢价权更高）， But I still suffer the PUA of my boss, ahahah, 再到晚上住到燕园校区那个宿舍；好吧，以某种青春叙事，这是一个奋斗的故事，which 很感人；但是我只想说，I had enough, and I don't want to meet friends who also believe in this story that fake it till you make it, I want to figure what's going to happen first, then behave or do something. well, 这不是说我立马辞去实习工作然后也不上课，直接游山玩水，成为隐士风流；每个人都有自己的命定，我注定不是这样的人；但我，就是顿悟的点就是，我们需要接纳自己的所有；所有被表扬的已完成的成就，所以有可能的成就；但也要接纳很多issues, accidents and disaster.朋友， 如果你有过惨痛人生经历 请告诉我让我长长见识///
之前，我一直很在意别人怎么看待我（原生家庭，先天性格影响），现在，我在意我能从关系中得到什么，我又能付出什么；说实话，别人似乎是一个原型（荣格的），就是你也不知道这是个啥东西，但它就像个symbol在你的脑海里念念不忘；念念不忘但没有回想；we have to admit, in this world, 每个人的意识形态都是自己有限生命背景的产物（性别，阶级，身份）， so there is no conscienious, although it's really precious) 高山流水觅知音，但终究我们还是孤岛； But don't get me wrong, I'm not encouraging you or me become anti-social, 这个也不由得你的自由意志，是否愿意和他人交往，其实我们的先天性格决定最多；Hhh,so 看到这里的朋友，我真心的告诉你，放下你的面具，你会活得很轻松； 你对世界的态度，对他人的态度决定了你自己；it's not what you eat or drink determines who you're < that's totally the lie of consumptionism, If you want to know more, lmk!~~~~
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