最近在老K的介绍下开始看Margaret Cho的脱口秀，Stand-up comedian这个词我不知道咋翻译好，总之就是她自己站台上讲笑话，跟台下互动，整整一场。
电驴上除了她参演的Drop dead diva之外最醒目的就是一个"Margaret Cho:Beautiful"的文件，700多M，高清的，我们可以清晰地看到她从手臂到胸前那一大片漂亮的彩色花朵纹身以及她丰富的表情。之前吃饭的时候老K给我讲她的几个段子的时候惟妙惟肖，“fag-hags are the back-bone of the gay community,without us,you're nothing！”我俩坐那儿狂笑，旁边的人都翻白眼（哈哈哈我们就是奥客怎样!)，这回下载回家瘫床上看，看得我几乎笑背过气去，曹大姐连说带比划，又黄又好笑又很聪明。她的话题主要围绕着同性恋/SEX/种族问题，笑话层出不穷，在采访里她自己也说：每次表演结束我都觉得我的笑话都抖完了，不知道哪儿来这么多！
I have a Mac sexuality in general, like, if you have sex with me, which you probably will at some point, please remember do not touch my anus, that is like my "force quit", you'll lose any unsaved changes.
The G-spot I really wanted to have...you know, have this whole G-spot experience because it's a very important thing for women sexuality and I wanna find my G-spot, cause I can't come from fucking...OK, went too fast, I'm sorry, let's go backwards: My name is Margaret, Korean, comedian, and 39,and I can't come from fucking! Why? Can you? Who can come from fucking?...Ok, gay guys don't count...I know you can come from fucking, gay guys are amazing, they can do anything.
I really want to get the G-shock, cause I thought, you know, it'll give me better orgasms, cause I'm so fucking Asian, if there's extra credit, I'm fucking doing it!
I enjoy being a fag-hag, I'm a life style fag-hag, I love it, I love going to gay bars until it becomes dick'o'clock. You know what time that is, don't you? That's when the gay men start looking for dick. It's like mid-night, or here it's like nine, and they start to looking for dick. If you don't have a dick, you don't have a reason to be in the gay bar, seriously, you need to leave. I mean you could be the best fag-hag in the world, you could be Judy Garland back from the dead.
I'm proud for now we have gay marriage in California,I don't understand why people hate gay marriage, people who hate gay marriage will never even know if gay people got married, because they don’t know any gay people!
I don’t like three-ways, I’ve had a few, I don’t enjoy them, they make me feel like a competitive eater… And if you are a straight girl, and your boyfriend wants to have a three-way with another man, he’s… gay.… I’m not trying to judge, I’ve just been in that situation, you know, when my boyfriend wanted to have a three-way with this other man, and then we’re there, and he’s like “Oh I’ve never done anything like this before…”, but then he was just on the thing…
I don’t like it when it gets racial, it gets racial sometime. I wrote a book and I went on this radio show to promote it, and they’re like “Margaret, we love the book, but tell us, what was it like to make Charlie’s Angels.””……No, I’m the one from Grey’s Anatomy.”
The toilet in India is different cuz it’s a hole in the ground, then you have to squat over it, I did not like it. Women in India wore saris which is the most flowing garment, I don’t know how they don’t get the bottoms all wet. But I realize that’s why their Goddesses have six arms.
Christians really hate that movie (Brokeback mountain), yet they love “the Passion of the Christ”! And when I saw “the Passion of the Christ”, I was like “Oh~~Jesus, say your safe word!”…Jesus is such a bottom!
I had a boy friend with long balls, his balls were so long, when he fucked me from behind, his balls would swing up between my legs, it could wipe a cigarette right off my mouth.
I’m not really into the super model body type, like Kate Moss, she doesn’t have a vagina, she didn’t feed it, and it died. Pussy can not survive on cocain alone.
I did this radio show and the DJ asked me:”What if you woke up tomorrow and you were beautiful?” ”What do you mean ‘what if’?!” He said “What if you woke up and you were blonde and you had blue eyes and you were five foot eleven, and you weight a hundred pounds, and you are beautiful, what would you do?” And I said “Well I probably wouldn’t get up, cuz I would be too weak to stand.” I feel very sorry for him, cuz that’s the only kinda person that you think is beautiful, you must not see very much beauty at all in the world. I think everybody is beautiful.